Patterson illustrates the concrete aspects of masculinity in which men do not want to be seen as "wearing a skirt." Whether it's negative stares, bumping in the hallway, or verbal harassment, anything can turn into physical altercations. On the one hand, not engaging can lead to future bullying, while fighting can prevent future incidents but result in legal or physical harm. Neither option is a complete survival plan. The same principles apply to back girls. Whether they are fighters or good girls, there is no real way to avoid conflict in their environment. Often, joining a gang can seem tempting, but then again, it also creates more enemies. For many young black people, confidence is a major part of their lives. When they don't have people to look up to or friends who won't betray them, their worldview is skewed. Ultimately, they believe they can only trust their family, which is why the motto "FOE" came about